found myself changing



She said she had the same flowers in her garden.

I looked up, wondering where I was. A moment ago I recalled walking along a bike path to the rhythm of a nuclear suburban anthem. My other eyelids must have blinked as I raised my gaze because the girl stepped back with a sort of gasp when she saw my face. 

"They are beautiful. Do you know what kind they are?"

"They're called Dahlia's." Her eyes softened as she returned my sight.

"Ah." I looked back at them and forgot where I was.

"So how long have you lived here?" I found myself asking as I sat across from her at an old wooden table at a park.

"About 5 years now."

"How do you like it?"

"Ya. It's okay...have you ever seen someone so anxious?" She curled in her seat as we drove past an old man at a bus stop. His eyes, bulging and red, stared into infinity, his lips were pulled into an unnerved hollow smile revealing chattering teeth.

"I think we can all feel sort of like that sometimes..." My gaze reverted back to the painted dashed lines dividing the road as the shops around us melted into rolling hills speckled with livestock and grain.

"Have you ever thought of living here?" Her voice soft and relaxed.

"I've thought about it. But it's hard for me to imagine living without the chaos of the city. You know?"

Her eyelids dimmed to the diluted rose that cast the room. She bit her lower lip. Her breathing slowed and quivered as she exhaled. 

She reached for my ear with a soft whisper... "I haven't done this in a while." 

I looked at her father, trying to disarm his stoic mannerisms. "If it doesn't work out. Can I shack up with you guys for a couple days?"

His head cocked back as if he'd just took a bite of something too spicy.

"Pardon me?"

"Do you have any Dahlia's? I'd like to surprise someone with a bouquet, but they need to have those."

She nodded. "I've the same flowers in my garden."









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